Cleaning

One of my hardest tasks is going to be cleaning my apartment.  In discussing this, I’ll also explain a bit about how I came up with my blog’s subtitle.

I’ve always had a really hard time cleaning and maintaining a clean space.  It got even harder when I had a difficult time and it got to be so bad I didn’t really know where to start.  Last year (I almost wrote, “earlier this year.” Oops!), I had an epiphany.  I realized that God really loved me.  And yes, I’ve known this forever, but I really felt it, felt that I might not be deserving of that, but I was still worth it.  And if God really, truly loved me, wasn’t I worth taking care of myself?  Wasn’t I worth living in a clean, pleasant space?

I was really inspired by this, and I cleaned regularly.  Not just the public areas, cleaned for others or out of embarrassment, but the whole thing, starting with my space, my bedroom.  Because I was doing this for me, not out of fear or shame, I didn’t do this like crazy, but bit by bit.  But I did work on it regularly.  Then, I had company and took a trip and got sick, and got out of the habit.  It became really hard to get back into the groove.

Joy of joys, I think I got my groove back today!  I cleaned for a while earlier today, and it was actually fun!  I feel like this is the real thing, and that I’ll be able to continue, a little bit at a time.  I think that in a week or two I might be caught up to where I was this summer, and then I can start making new progress: sorting, organizing, getting rid of stuff, and deep cleaning.  This is just what I was hoping for from this project.  I know that this is early yet, but I’m starting to feel optimistic.